I just found this on a digital Post-it note, which I am in the middle of clearing out. Some time back, I was at some web site, probably about.add.com, and I came across some article that was geared towards men. I had written this to post it to, but for whatever reason, never did. I think that is was a technical issue, or I didn't want it to time out on me, or some such thing.
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This isn't just for men
I know that this article is geared towards men, however, it sounds like this particular female's life.
For years, before being diagnosed with ADHD, I was a lot like like the 'male' described here. Even though I started on Lithium in my 20s for manic-only bipolar, I still had most of these problems. I had always lived by the philosophy of 'this is how I am', forcing people to accept what was presented to them, although most never did.
My ex left me over my 'faults': spending too much/money that wasn't available, and many other issues, leaving him to try and set things right. I have to admit that after a time, I grew to depend on that, which allowed me to continue my bad behaviors.
Even though I have been on medicines since 2003, I am still trying to learn better behaviors. My relationship with my boyfriend is pretty close to what it was with my ex; constant 'rerun' fights over the same ol' subjects, and other innane stuff. The major difference this time around is that he is aware of what makes me 'me', so he is armed better. However, it is draining on him to have to deal with my items sometimes, fights over finances, being asked to remember things.
For the longest time, he tried to give me the 'just do it' philosophy, like so many others have tried to do. I was finally able to make him come to see that it almost impossible to 'just do it' when you don't know 'what' you are supposed to be doing. Even though most everyone around us is 'just doing it' doesn't mean that we've picked up the how-tos. To this day, I have never dieted like so many women have. Don't get me wrong, I have restricted what I eat at times, things like that. However, if I wanted to have a candy bar everyday for two weeks in a row, I would probably not deny myself. I usually eat more than I need to, having 3 (sometimes 4) eggs in an omelet, instead of just 2, just because I've given in to, not the actual hunger, but the mental desire to eat what I think will fill me. And believe me, I know that I should probably just half what ever amount that I want to eat (or buy, or whatever), but I always give in to whatever desire it is. That's got to drive linears around me crazy, that I can't put limits on myself and keep them. I would not survive on 'Diet Tribe' lol.
It seems like I am always trying to find the limitations from outside of me, instead of within. To that end, I had asked my ex to help me limiit some things. There was real irony there, because I always go back against whatever limits that I wanted, and do it anyway. I'm sure that drove him crazy, because on top of everything else, I then was not keeping my word.
Maybe it should be geared towards those that are full-blown ADHD, male or female.
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